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20 and married

“You’re MARRIED? How old are you?”

“Aren’t you like 20?”

“Why would you want to be married so young?!”

I’m a 20-year-old full-time college student, a Missouri Western employee, the news editor for the Griffon News and a wife. Unfortunately, many people think one of these things doesn’t fit. I’ll give you a hint: it starts with a ‘w’ and ends with ‘ife.’

People judge me on a regular basis because of my age and marital status.

I get a lot of the expected comments, including how I don’t really know myself, I haven’t had enough life experience to make such a big decision and how there is no way I could actually be ready to be married at such a young age.

There are also the people that like to tell me how terrible my life must be because I’m married. These comments are usually something like, ‘I’m so glad I’M not married,’ and, ‘You are seriously crazy. I bet it sucks to have someone to answer to.’

Believe me, I get it. I understand that marriage is not for everyone, and it is especially not for everyone in their early 20s.

But, it is for me.

I absolutely love being married. It’s not just that I love my new family (because I definitely do) or that I love to sign my new last name (because I definitely do…) It’s because I get to spend the rest of my life with my best friend and, someday, start a family with him.

My husband is an incredible blessing to me on a daily basis. I am so glad we were able to start our lives together earlier than most, and I will never regret getting to make that many more memories with my favorite person in the world.

I really believe that God put my husband in my life and allowed me to marry him while I am young for a lot of reasons, one being to save me a lot of heartache. I got to check out of the dating scene a lot earlier than most girls do, and I see that as a definite benefit.

I also think being married young allows me to have a much firmer understanding of what my life plans can and will be. I know now the man that I will spend the rest of my life with, and we can plan out goals and a future together. If I were still single, I would of course have my own plans, but never know if they would be the same plans I would choose if I already knew who my life partner would be.

I’m sure some people will read this column and think that I am weird or crazy to be married so young and to have these kinds of ideas about marriage and the rest of my life.

Good thing they aren’t the ones getting to live it, because I couldn’t be happier.

My advice – if you don’t think you want to or aren’t ready to get married young, don’t do it. Just don’t take it out on someone who was ready.

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