Max the Griffon comes out of closet

Commentary Opinion

After a one night stand following the last meeting of the two schools, Max the Griffon came out about his feelings for Bobby the Bear-Cat and announced his forgiveness in the bear-cat’s complicity in hiding his herpes infection which Max now shares. The two mascots now await the state of Missouri to legalize same-sex mascot marriage.

None of the above is true. April Fool’s!

On April 1, 1990, the universe played the biggest joke on me that it had ever played in my 18 years of life. I moved to St. Joseph, Mo., on that day. After that I started to see a special significance to April Fool’s Day that I had not seen before. I also realized that life’s sense of humor was indeed a dark one.

Don’t get me wrong, before 1990 I had loved April Fool’s Day. I was the first to step and pull an outrageous prank like planting ketchup packets under the seats of every toilet in school, or filling my friends convertible with popcorn. To this day I still call into work every April 1 to tell them I quit just before I show up and say “April Fool’s” with a laugh and a smile. This could be my favorite holiday just behind Halloween. Let’s face it, pranks are fun.

Also, this is a special day that glorifies the fool. Unlike America, where glorify the fool every time we turn on the T.V. Much of the world leaves that for this one special day. I have always loved the fool as a concept and it is probably my favorite tarot card. I, myself, love being a fool because it means that I can always keep learning. Besides, fools really know how to laugh; loud laughs, not the nervous snicker that the rest of society pulls off. I think the fool truly does deserve his day.

So this year, step up the prank pulling. Remember this for a day that may have sprung for the tales of Chaucer’s Canterbury Tales and has spread across the world. It is the day to slap the April Fish on your buddies’ backs. On this day in history the Aleutian earthquake hit 7.8 and the Royal Air Force was created. It was the day when Day Light Savings time was introduced in the U.S.S.R and the day when the Netherlands legalized same-sex marriages. It is the birthday of rapper Method Man and Chief Justice Samuel Alito. It is the day that Marvin Gaye died. It is right at the beginning of spring and the world is giving you another chance at another year. It is great to walk the world like a fool with no cares and no worries.

So go be a fool.

Pull a prank.

Happy April Fool’s day

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