Let’s Talk About Abstinence, Baby

By Danielle Dodson

Sex seems to be an increasingly controversial issue among college students. One aspect of this argument that many adolescents and young adults don’t seem to remember is that not everyone is doing it. In fact, according to the Center for Disease Control, 27.9 percent of college students aren’t.

Whether it’s a lifestyle choice, personal preference, or part of a religious doctrine, abstinence is a growing movement among college students, rising 4 percent in popularity during the past year alone.

Inarguably, abstinence is the most effective form of birth control on the market. It’s 100 percent effective, no-cost, and maintenance free. For the majority, these aren’t selling points on refraining from sex, but rather a heavy suggestion. For some, like sophomore Marcus Polson, responsibility during sex is more important than whether or not you’re doing it.

“Whether you’re in a relationship or not, if you’re having sex, it should be done responsibly,” Polson said. “Personally, a long-term relationship without sex would be awkward, but if you’re not careful, things can easily go wrong and go directions neither party wants.”

For some, the choice to have sex isn’t about protecting yourself from STDs or unwanted pregnancy, but rather enforcing beliefs that are indoctrinated within their personal system of beliefs.

Missouri Western Grad student Rebecca Dyer claims that being raised within The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints gave her the foundation she needed to abstain from sex until marriage.

“Having been grown up in the church my whole life I feel lucky to have been taught at a very young age that having a loving family is important,” Dyer said. “We believe that families can be together forever. Hence, being abstinent is very important until you are married.”

For some young people, sex has the power to make or break a relationship, and it’s all about timing. If you’re trying to find “Mr. or Mrs. Right,” a physical relationship right from the beginning might distort the reality of emotional ties between you and the person you’re dating.

Carrie Jones, a junior at Missouri Western, agrees that the choice lies in finding a genuine connection first.

“If it’s right, then it’s right. You have to take the physical with the emotional, and make a serious decision that’s right for you, and only you,” Jones said. “It can change the dynamics of a relationship in an instant, and if you can’t handle that, you shouldn’t be having sex.”

Jones isn’t alone in these feelings. Many adults feel that the choice to have sex before marriage or casual sex through college has had lasting effects on their life and relationships. Many feel that one sex happens with one person once, it gets increasingly easier for it to happen again.

As Valentine’s Day has just passed, and spring break rolls around, so will the topic of spending a little extra time with your significant other, attending parties, and meeting new people. The most important aspect of sex is knowing what is best for you personally and what you are emotionally and mentally ready for. If sex doesn’t fit into that equation, there’s no harm in waiting until the math adds up.