The Griffon News

After months of feeling tired and sick to her stomach 20-year-old Western soccer goalie, Shaylynn Milbourn, decided it was time to go to the doctor. She didn’t know she’d leave with the shock of her life.

Karon Milbourn started to worry when she hadn’t heard from her daughter hours after Shay’s appointment.

Karon picked up the phone and called, only to find her daughter crying and unwilling to talk. After waiting 20 minutes Karon couldn’t stand it and had to call back. Shay was still crying and said she was on the other line with her boyfriend and would have to call her back.

“Well it didn’t take much for me to put two and two together,” Karon said. “I called back and told her to meet me at Wendy’s.”

As Shay sat in her car in the parking lot of Wendy’s, she tried to hold back the tears and act like everything was okay.

“I drove up to Wendy’s and she was sitting in her car crying and I went over and I tapped on the window and I said, ‘Am I going to be a grandma again?’”

Shay jumped out of the car, grabbed her mother and the two shared a meaningful hug.

Shay, a St. Joseph native, found out she was pregnant in January after her first season with Western’s soccer team. She was already four months along.

“I remember sitting in the room and the doctor opened the door with a smile on his face and said ‘You’re going to be a momma’ and I laughed because I thought he was joking but he wasn’t,” Shay said.

Shay, a member of Alpha Sigma Alpha, was raised in a very religious household and was taught that sex before marriage was wrong, and telling her mother was one of the hardest things she had to do.

“I honestly thought she was going to disown me but I was completely wrong,” Shay said. “I remember thinking that life was going to end for me and how people wouldn’t respect me anymore.”

She soon learned that she had more people rooting for her than she had imagined but the one person that mattered the most chose to go a different route.

The man Shay was in a relationship with chose not to be a part of Shay’s life and the life of his unborn baby.

Shay said that having an abortion was never an option and neither was becoming a quitter.

“I can’t say that this is easy, because it was hard when you’re brought up in certain standards…but I love my daughter and I’m going to be there for her,” Karon said.

After telling her mother, it was now time to tell her new soccer coach the news.

Jeff Hansen was hired the end of December to be the new head soccer coach and hadn’t really had a chance to get to know the players yet. Shay said she knew she had to tell him right away.

“I wanted to play, and I didn’t want him to think I couldn’t do it,” said Shay, who transferred from the University of Nebraska in 2005. “With a new coach you’re thinking is he going to take my scholarship away. I need my scholarship it helps me so much with school.”

Shay, who played soccer at Lafayette High School, said thoughts of quitting soccer did cross her mind but her drive, dreams and passion wouldn’t let that happen just because she was pregnant. She knew it was going to be a challenge, but didn’t want or expect any special treatment from her coach.

Hansen said this was just a situation that’s to be dealt with, and isn’t anything to punish a player about, like taking away scholarship money.

With the support from her new coach, Shay hoped she would receive the same support from her teammates. Shay said the first year the girls were not close and struggled as a family.

“I can’t say I was close with the girls and then I got pregnant and it seemed like everything changed,” Shay said. “They’re all there for me…it was amazing to have everybody be like ‘I’m here for you.’”

Shay gave birth to a baby girl on June 30 at 2:31 p.m. after 19 hours of labor. Chloe weighed 7 pounds, 5 ounce and 21 ½ inches long.

“I remember the World Cup Soccer was on the TV in my room during my labor; how cool is that?” Shay said. “When Chloe finally came into the world and she was in my arms the entire world froze. I don’t remember anything other than her and feeling like she was my biggest and best accomplishment.”

During her pregnancy Shay still did off-season drills up until her fifth month when she was reverted to riding the bike and doing the stair machines to keep physically active.

After Chloe’s birth it didn’t take long for Shay to want to get back in the swing of things.

“I remember Shay told me like three weeks after she had Chloe she was walking around the mall and she got around three times and couldn’t do it anymore she was so tired,” Hansen said. But Shay’s determination never vanished it only got stronger. Preseason soccer started around August and Shay was strong-minded to push herself to the limit.

“She’s kind of like one of those bloodhounds,” Hansen said. “They’ll just sniff and go as long as they can and you’ve got to
stop them. So we had to shut her down for a couple days during preseason because even though she was struggling, she wanted to keep going, keep going and keep going.”

Even though Shay pressed herself during practice, Hansen saw her frustrations telling her she’s got to expect mistakes because she might be ready mentally but not physically.

The soccer season kicked off Aug. 24, just two months after Shay gave birth. Then the hard part for Shay came, the first away game. On Sept. 3 the team traveled to Minnesota. The bus hadn’t even let the parking lot yet and Shay remembered calling her
mother numerous times to check on Chloe.

“She was crying and called me and I thought ‘Oh dear lord she’s going to call like every 10 to 15 minutes,’” Karon said. “They got on the highway and in like 40 minutes she called me again.”

Shay said that leaving Chloe was one of the hardest things and for the first time she realized she was actually a mom. The first road game of the season, the first time being away from her baby, also brought Shay her first shut-out game. When Shay got back home she woke Chloe up and held her for hours.

“I couldn’t put her down,” Shay said. “I hated being away from her, but towards the end it got a little bit easier.”

Soccer season ended Oct. 29 and Shay said she’s looking forward to spending more time with Chloe and preparing for spring soccer.

“Chloe has my full attention…she is my life and I thank God every day for her,” Shay said. “Yes I am an unwed mother and yes I have fears, doubts and struggles, but I wouldn’t trade any of it for what I have.”

Both Karon and Shay said that no matter what mood they might in or any frustrations they might have, all they have to do is look at Chloe and all the worries go out the window when they see her little smile.

Shay stays in school and continues to study Elementary Education and play soccer. She doesn’t want to get older and think that she quit just because she had a child.

“Chloe gives me strength every day, the drive to succeed and the ability to juggle all my daily tasks without hesitation,” Shay said. “I think I’m doing a pretty good job of being mom and dad, and I’m trying and I think that she can feel that. I give her everything I have.”